Feminism and Writing Sexy Books

by Jackie Ashenden, author of Ruined

I love writing hot romance because romance is the only genre in which the heroine gets everything she wants – love, great sex, a hot dude and a happily ever after. My romances are on the darker, grittier end of the spectrum, and they’re fairly hot. But in each and every one, the heroine—no matter who she is or what she’s done in her life—gets to have each and everything she’s always dreamed of.

And why shouldn’t she? Why shouldn’t women get to have everything? Why shouldn’t they get the hot billionaire or biker?  Why shouldn’t they get the fantastic sex they’ve always wanted? Why should they have to compromise on their fantasies, when in real life women have to compromise on just about everything else?

I write books where the heroine doesn’t have to compromise on her happy ending or when it comes to sexy times. Whatever fantasy she wants, the hero will fulfill it for her because satisfying her needs is what he’s there for.

This is where the heroine can discover her sexual power. Where she can be desired and wanted by the hero without having to be anyone or do anything. She can be herself with him, just as she is, and he’ll still want her.

And writing a heroine who explores that newfound power and how to wield it is really so satisfying. The hero might be the one telling her what he wants, but she’s the one who can choose whether to give it to him or not. In the kind of love scenes I write, he might be the dominant one in the bedroom, but she’s the one with the power – her submission to him is her choice, and if he wants it, he’s going to have to do whatever it takes for her to give it to him willingly.

Seriously, there’s nothing more satisfying to write than an uber strong, sexy, alpha guy who has the world in the palm of his hand, brought to his knees both emotionally and sexually by the heroine.

I find that personally very empowering.

Because in the end, heroines can be all kinds of women – strong or shy, submissive or dominant, sassy or silent. But true empowerment comes from allowing women’s desires to be valued and respected.

Whatever those desires may be.


About Ruined:

“We have to act like a real couple…”

The solution? Mind-blowingly real pleasure!

Dane “Smoke” Kingsolver and Cat Livingston need to fake a relationship to get her abusive ex off her back. Convincing people their friendship has heated up to scorching levels is unexpectedly easy! But when their red-hot chemistry threatens to ruin everything they’ve ever known can they go back to what they had before? And do they even want to?

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Comment ( 1 )
  1. Yvonne Cruz
    March 8, 2018 at 3:04 pm

    Well said. That’s why I love your books

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